The Squeak Who Stole Christmas
by Milena D
Summary: Vala and Daniel have been having a lot of bad days this Holiday Season but find something completely random to cheer each other up.


Vala was a bundle of energy. A veritable box of firecrackers just waiting for a match. She was known for skipping down hallways, wearing a constant smile of mildly fluctuating enthusiasm. She greeted people warmly, flirted with them if the mood struck, and the mood always struck, really. At first, her abundant eagerness had grated on many a nerve in the SGC bunker but with the passing of time, and the constancy of her zeal, the soldiers, scientists, and doctors had all adapted and now relished the boost in morale her sunny disposition brought. She was a ray of light in the heart of a mountain, and it was expected to only grow brighter as the year slipped into its final, snowy month.

"Watch it!" Dr. Lee snapped at Walter, his face warped into a frustrated scowl as the man tried to move out of his way.

_But perhaps they had adapted too completely to her energy..._

"I don't really care." Walter muttered a little too loudly for it to be under his breath as Siler glared at him, wrench in hand. "I need to run diagnostics. I can't exactly do that with you ripping out the hardware, can I?"

_...because, as the past few weeks had demonstrated..._

"Look, I'm sorry, Colonel, but it's not happening today." Siler explained _again_, barely holding back the irate sigh begging to be unleashed. "You're just going to have to push your simulation back to another day. It's not that important, is it?" He asked, leaving Sam Carter with some distinctly ruffled feathers.

_...when the sun sets in the middle of the day..._

"Why don't you just take a break?" Cam suggested.

"Why don't you go bug, Teal'c?" Sam retorted, lips pursed.

_...those who live underground have a hard time finding light._

"Seriously, what is up with everyone lately?" Cam asked, throwing a left hook at his opponent. "You can barely get a cup of coffee without someone biting your head off."

"People have certainly appeared to be under great strain as of late." Teal'c replied, easily avoiding the blows of his sparring partner.

"Why?" Cam demanded, needing an reason for the dark pall almost visible in every room and hallway of his second home. "There have been no attacks, no threats, no potentially-mountain-destroying-explosions since last month with Bill. Why is everyone acting like something vile crawled up their rears, died, and left a will telling its spawns to piss everyone off? Even Vala's been glummin' around."

"I believe ValaMalDoran might, in fact, be the horse."

Cam paused mid-fight and relaxed his fighting stance, a concentrated look on his face. "I feel like you're trying to get a saying across."

"Your feelings are correct." His partner nodded. "It would be wise not to place the cart before the horse."

"Right." Cam replied slowly. "And Vala is the horse, not the cart. Okay."

Teal'c merely smirked and resumed the sparring session. Cameron may not have understood but Vala would have. She was definitely the horse whose recent lameness of spirit was running the SGC cart into the ditch.

For an entire month now, she had been temporarily transferred to another team and it was killing her. She had already missed out on the main Thanksgiving celebrations with her gang because the fledgling anthropologist on this damnation of a team couldn't be pried away from the Goa'uld sarcophagi he'd found. Never mind that they would have been there a few days later, like they had been for centuries. Never mind that there was zero traffic on that planet due to a bad omen believed to be found there and there was therefore zero chance of someone making off with them. And never mind that it would have been Vala's first thanksgiving with her team, her friends, her family. It was a few years since she'd become the fifth member of SG-1 but she had yet to spend the holidays in the traditional ways due to crises, attacks, galactic catastrophes, etc.

This entire little adventure was an exercise in pointlessness anyway. Alright, so Vala's title in the SGC was officially that of "External Consultant" since she was neither a scientist (though, to be fair, she wasn't exactly sure how Daniel was considered one either), nor a soldier (though, again, she had proven she could take Daniel down without much of a fuss), but she didn't see how that automatically made her a viable candidate for bringing new teams into the field to show them the ropes of gate-travel and the likes. Samantha had urged her to consider this as the token of the esteem the higher-ups now had in her. That they must truly trust her and have faith in her to put a team of new recruits in her care. Cameron, on the other hand, had felt the need to point out what a good test it would be for a new team to learn to work together under the guidance of less-than-reputable alien folk, to figure out the rights and wrongs of the galaxy-traipsing life much like a bunch of infants would. Vala tended to side with Cameron on this one.

But she had tried. She had tried to take on this responsibility with enthusiasm and encouragement and to some degree, good was coming out of it. The four members of this team were certainly working very well together, just not with her. It may have been her flirtatious spirit, her sultry good looks, or her husky voice but for some reason, this three-man, one-woman team of pale, clammy scientists just didn't know quite how to communicate with her. It made a great rallying point for them, but she was, yet again, the odd-man out. And while she was stuck, endlessly, in rooms and on planets with them, her friends were getting their holiday cheer on without her.

"Ms. Mal Doran?" Squeaky, as she called him in her head, called from across the table. "Are you listening?"

"Yes," she sighed, resisting the urge to bang her head against the table. "Should we come upon attacking trees - which, no, isn't completely out of the realm of possibility. Thank you, Dr. Meyers. - I would suggest that we regroup, return to the SGC to report our findings, and let General Landry decide on the best course of action. Just like we would in the case of swarming birds emitting higher-than-tolerable frequency chirps and/or killer squirrels foraging our bodies for nuts."

"Okay, thank you, Ms. Mal Doran." Squeaky replied, he and his teammates noting every single word she had said. She had taken to making longer speeches to prolong the quiet-time their note-taking brought. She was really hating the holiday season.

"Oh, and Ms. Mal Doran?"

Hating it.

ooooooooooooooooooooooo

Daniel held the elevator door open with his foot for Cam, Sam and Teal'c as they had some trouble exiting efficiently so laden were their arms with bags.

"I told you guys you shouldn't have gone so overboard." He admonished them, not offering his help as they finally started to squeeze out.

"It's her first actual Christmas." Sam repeated for the umpteenth time before cursing when one of her plastic bags' handles broke.

"And she's miserable. If you weren't a perpetual Scrooge lately, you might understand this whole Christmas spirit thing." Cam goaded him easily, readjusting his bags on his forearms before moving on.

"I understand that you guys have spent a small fortune on decorations and novelty baubles for someone who, if she's aware of the holidays at all, will probably still be stuck with that other team for their entirety. We don't exactly have the best holiday track record." He replied cynically, following after them as they slowly made their way down the hall.

"ValaMalDoran has been greatly anticipating Christmas since the end of Halloween." Teal'c informed him, looking better off than the others despite carrying a heavier load. "She was most saddened that she could not take part in the Thanksgiving celebrations."

"Exactly," Daniel muttered, wanting this debate to just be over with. "So you guys have fun planning a party for someone who likely won't even be able to show. I'm sure that'll make her feel better." And with that, he doubled-back and left the group standing in the hallway with varying looks of disapproval on their faces.

"What is the matter with him?" Sam asked, incredulous. "He's never been that enthusiastic about celebrating things but he's never been downright against it."

Cam sent Teal'c a questioning glance and nodded when the man's eyes reflected his opinion. "He's got the horse flu."

ooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Daniel wasn't against celebrating anything...but they were right in noticing his bad mood. It was the winter blues. The timing fit perfectly, starting about a month ago when it had started to get colder, the days didn't last as long, the nights were endless... And although SG-1 had been a fully-functioning team well before Vala came along, Landry had decided against sending them out into the field while she was babysitting the new recruits. Daniel should have been thrilled beyond compare to have so much time in his lab with the extreme pile-up of backlogged items to go over. Sam certainly was. But for some reason, getting up every morning seemed painfully routine and meaningless, pouring over ancient texts gave him no challenge and, with great alarm, he actually found himself a little bored at times. Cam and Teal'c had kept the foursome from really separating into their own little worlds by hassling them for suppers or lunches, or, like today, a shopping spree. But that did nothing to alleviate Daniel's supreme apathy and weariness. They often only served to increase his frustrations. Which is why, hours later, he was enjoying the prospect of a meal alone in the darkened cafeteria. Only someone was already there.

"Vala?" He called out, the annoyance in his voice hard to contain. His displeasure faded greatly, however, when her tired eyes lifted up to his and his own unhappiness was reflected on her face. "Mind if I join you?"

"Not at all," she said, a hint of a smile on her lips, kicking a chair out opposite her. "I feel like I haven't seen any of you in years."

"Likewise," he said quietly, realizing just how long she'd been gone. Just over a month, wasn't it? He grabbed a tray of left-over meals the kitchen staff prepared for those working overnight and sat down. "How is the training coming along?"

"Good! Great even! I'm not at all tempted to take a detour to a known Lucian Alliance dominated world and throw them into the fray like helpless lambs to end all our misery." She replied brightly, a little too brightly to be subtle.

"That bad?" He grinned, his cheek muscles sore from disuse. Vala discretely pulled her plate to the other side of her tray and let her head fall into her hands.

"I don't think they belong off-world." She admitted with a sigh. "I don't even think they belong outdoors. I think the mountain is truly the best place for them: it's underground so the sun won't find them, it has toys for them to play with, and there are soldiers and solid metal doors to keep them from hurting themselves."

Daniel chuckled before biting into his dinner roll. "Have you told General Landry?"

"I've made it quite clear, quite loudly to the General," she reported, a twitch discernable under her eye as she spoke, "and he is firmly of the opinion that all SGC personnel should have a certain number of hours off-world before being assigned permanently."

"And you have to be the one to lead them?" Her dining companion asked, leaving Vala to wonder if she'd imagined that hint of frustration in his tone.

"No," she huffed. "Apparently they first go out with an off-world specialist just to get their feet wet and once they're comfortable, a marine will take them out and put them through the hard stuff. It's said that this stage is only supposed to last two weeks, three at the absolute maximum."

"You've been at it for four, haven't you?"

"That I have." She groaned before shaking her head. "But enough about the infants in my care, what's been going on with the team? What have you guys been up to?"

"Not much, to be honest," Daniel replied.

As he recounted the unexciting exploits of SG-1, he took the time to notice how different the woman in front of him was. Maybe "different" wasn't the right word though. She was uncharacteristically sedate, quiet, and looked completely drained. Teal'c might have been on the money, however, as Daniel had seen the green and red socks hiding under the standard issue fatigue pants. There was also a small tousle of shiny gold and silver christmas tree icicles sitting desolately on the table he thought might have been made to wear in her hair and he found himself imagining what it might look like wrapped in her dark locks.

Wait. What?

"Anyway," he said abruptly, surprising Vala by rising from his chair and grabbing their trays, "it's pretty late. We should probably get to bed." What followed shocked him in that it wasn't vulgar at all.

"You're probably right." She said with a sigh, throwing out their napkins and making for the door. "It was nice seeing you." And she was gone, leaving him holding their trays and his dropped jaw. He moved to deposit his load in the basin when Vala's empty plate shifted and bared a scribbled picture to his eyes.

It was a hatless Santa Claus looking very distraught, and to the right was a doodle of what appeared to be a short man in a white lab coat running away, stolen-hat in hand, with the caption "SQUEAK" coming from its mouth. He couldn't help but smile, holding back his chuckle.

Where once he might have tracked her down and rebuked her for vandalizing SGC property, he now looked around until he found the pencil with which she left her art and added his own touch before leaving their trays and dishes in the basin and going to bed, considerably more cheerful than he had been waking up that morning.

ooooooooooooo

It had been several days since she'd seen Daniel and Vala was so caught in the daily mental grind that it seemed like the event had taken place months ago, years even. After an incident off-world where the woman on the team, Dr. Meyers, had accidentally knocked out a stone on a statue that opened a trap door, causing Screech - as he was heretofore to be known - to fall into a pit and spend an hour screaming and pleading with his maker to spare his life, Landry had confined them to base. Days, now, into watching them read journals and mission reports had Vala almost wishing she were back at the top of that pit. Anything was better than waking up to this every day.

"Finally." Vala sighed wearily as she glanced at the clock. "That's all for today, children. Feel free to take your little booklets home and study up on your own time."

Before any of them had the chance to respond, she had bolted from the room and down the hallway. They couldn't run very well so as long as she put a good distance between them at the start she should be fine. She didn't know where the guys could be - she never knew anymore - but the mess was always the best place to find people so that's where she headed to. Sadly, all she found there were glaringly joyful holiday decorations and teams that were not her own.

Dejected, she simply went to the dessert aisle and picked up one of everything. Slowly, not really tasting anything, she scooped every bit of jello and chocolate pudding out of their cups until she could see clear through the containers and there, she found the first thing to make her smile in a long time. It was her doodle from the other night: Squeak running off with Santa's hat. But now there was an addition: halting Squeak's escape was a taller-than-average elf, pointy ears and all. He stood to the right of Squeak, in his way, his arm outstretched and his palm placed perfectly to catch the little rat right in the face. It was a nice effort, but unfortunately not exactly reflective of facts as they were. She went to the next table and borrowed a pencil from an airman filling out a report and then she went to town on her Christmas tray.

oooooooooooooooo

The next morning, as he had every morning since he'd last seen her, Daniel headed out to the cafeteria earlier than usual. He always made the rounds checking the already occupied tables, then made his way down the line starting at the register, then past the cooks, and finally found himself at the stack of trays if no one else had appropriated his. Every morning he'd found their tray and was disappointed. This morning, however, everyone in the room was jolted out of their early-morning near comatose state at his short burst of laughter.

His elf was where he'd left him but on his shoulder she'd denoted his loyalties - an SG-1 badge - and to his right, at his back, she had drawn another little lab person primed to throw a snowball at the elf's head. The new little devil's caption: Screech.

Well. If she thought a snowball was going to deter his elves...

Daniel took out the pencil he'd taken to carrying around and went to work.

oooooooooooooooo

Vala should have been on her fifth sigh by now. It was already 11am, for cryin' out loud. And yet, though there wasn't quite a smile on her lips, her face reflected much less melancholy than her new recruits were used to. She kept thinking back to Daniel's elf, or more to the point, Daniel vandalizing something. For her. It was so completely unlike him and although part of her wondered if something had happened in the time she'd been away to make him so much more easy-going, a bigger part of her was just thankful she was finally feeling a shred of glee during the holiday season.

One thing hadn't changed however, her constant glances to the clock. She hadn't gone to the mess for breakfast but she was dying to go for lunch. She lasted until about 11:29 before she got up and blurted, "Well I think it's about high-time for lunch. Be back in an hour!" and sped out of the room.

The cafeteria was packed. Thankfully, she had almost no inhibitions keeping her from _discreetly_ checking out all the diners' trays and soon enough she was pulling Bill's out from under him, and shooting him a wide smile before skipping off. So enthused with her find, Vala didn't pay any attention to the near-miss she left behind when Bill hastily rose to leave and almost collided with Walter.

"Oh, Sgt.," he exclaimed, steadying the man he almost knocked over. "I'm so sorry, I wasn't looking."

"Don't worry about it, Doctor." Walter replied with a polite smile before moving on.

No, Vala heard none of it. She had sat down at a table near the door, her prize clutched to her chest. She closed her eyes and set it down on the table before peeking and promptly bursting out laughing, attracting the amused gazes of most of the room.

Near the right edge of the tray now, behind Screech were three SG-1 elves, including one with longer, darker hair. They were all equipped with zat guns, active and aimed at Screech. And that wasn't nearly the long and short of it. Flying above the entire group was air support in the form of a rough and surprisingly crude drawing of the _Odyssey_, and Daniel had also added a kind of rising platform where an elf bearing a striking resemblance to a certain Jaffa was standing guard over the remaining two lab people with the appropriate captions: "Tweedledee" and "Tweedledum". While Vala was laughing to herself, she didn't notice two of SGC's most distinguished personnel walking out of the cafeteria.

"So I'm finished running those diagnostics," Walter informed his friend somewhat sheepishly. "The control room is all yours for whatever you need."

"Thanks." Siler replied, accepting the apology implied. "I shouldn't be too long."

"Take all the time you need." Walter assured him cheerily.

An hour later, Vala still hadn't left the cafeteria. She had hoped that Daniel would be coming for lunch but he hadn't shown. Far from discouraged, she had found a pencil and added the final touches to the Christmas tray-mural before practically bouncing down the halls, close to Sam's office where Siler was knocking.

"Colonel?" He called, popping his head into the room. "I just wanted to let you know that I've prepped the control rooms for that simulation you wanted to run. I'm sorry it took so long."

A blonde head appeared from behind the opened door, her smile lighting up her face. "Really?"

"Yes, ma'am." Siler bobbed his head with a grin. "I'll be up there when you're ready."

"Thank you, Sergeant." She beamed. "I'll be right there."

Vala smiled brightly at the happy Sergeant and was about to keep walking when she distinctly heard a new voice in Sam's office. An unhappy voice.

"But you said you could take a break." It said, a sigh in its tone. "We were supposed to go have lunch topside, away from prying eyes."

"Please, Cam, I've been dying to run this simulation for weeks. It could mean a whole new field of study if it's successful." Sam pleaded to Vala's extremely surprised ears. She was so very tempted to glue her ear to the door to find out exactly how much she'd missed in the last month but she could hear them moving and simply hid around the corner.

"You're right." He said, resigned but happy for her. "You've been waiting for this for a while. And I will see you later when we prep for the party."

"Yes you will." Vala could hear the smile in her friend's voice, a certain smile she was very familiar with. "And during the party. And after the party."

"You know, we could just cancel the party and go straight to that after part." He suggested with a grin. Sam laughed but pushed him away.

"Go hang out with Teal'c, I have a simulation to run." Sam told him, smiling as she turned and headed for the control room.

As soon as both were out of sight, Vala sped off to reach her own destination. She didn't bother knocking or announcing herself, she simply threw herself into the room, brandishing the tray like an award. Had she known what stupors of boredom Daniel had been enshrouded in she might have understood that his look of shock and confusion was actually expressing delight at her intrusion, not irritation. Either way, she didn't care.

"You saved Christmas." She announced, trying to hold back her glee.

"Did I?" He retorted with a small, upward-tug of his lips, barely feigning ignorance.

"You did." She affirmed, sliding up to him and placing the tray down on his counter. "But you forgot one detail."

"Where?" He asked, peering down to see what might have been changed since his elaborate additions.

"Right here, see?" Vala pointed down at Santa's face, particularly at Santa's very large, very bushy eyebrows.

"Is that General Landry?" Daniel chuckled freely.

"General Claus, if you please. And Walter!" Vala tapped her fingernail against the tray, drawing his attention to the smaller-than-average elf peeking out from behind Santa's legs and handing him a new hat.

"Now it's really finished." Daniel said proudly, sitting back in his chair with a genuine smile.

"Never would have continued without you." She retuned, perching herself on his desk and beaming a bit more when he didn't seem to mind.

"Well I couldn't let 'Squeak' ruin your whole idea of the holidays." He replied modestly, idly pushing the tray with his index. "Shouldn't you be babysitting them now?"

"I gave myself the afternoon off." She decided on the spot, slipping off the desk. "They should be figuring it out soon. The good General seems to do so every time that bunch is on his schedule so why not?" She asked rhetorically. "I say we get out of here. Go topside. Paint the town ruby red and stay out till dawn!"

Daniel had to appreciate her passion for downtime but remained in his seat. "I think we should stay on base tonight. I heard there might be some kind of...gathering or something."

"The secret party Samantha and Cameron are throwing?" Vala asked innocently. "Yes, I know about that, darling, and I assure you, I don't think they would mind at all if we didn't show. I think they might have other plans in the works."

Daniel frowned in consternation. "What other plans could they possibly have?"

"Well I could show you." Vala offered, making a move to go to the door, her voice light and leveled. "I gathered that it was pretty hush-hush but I think it's fantastic."

"Yeah, sure." Daniel said, getting up, his frown of question still firmly in place. He followed Vala to the door but instead of walking through it, she quickly shut it, turned in place and softly pressed her lips against his. And when the suddenness of her actions stunned him into a gasp, who was she to refuse the opportunity of his parted lips? Long moments later, when Daniel regained his presence of mind, he quickly broke the kiss and leaned back...though he didn't quite push her away. Vala watched his eyes with mild trepidation as he processed what had happened and when they shone with clarity, she held her breath.

"Sam and Cam?" He asked her, gaping, causing her to release her breath as a laugh.

"Yes, darling." She replied, stepping closer, her voice slightly more quiet than usual. "It seems our fearless leaders have been up to naughty things while I was away."

"Sam and Cam." He repeated, eyebrows inching back to their normal position very slowly.

"Mmhm." She affirmed distractedly, relishing every moment he didn't pull away, even as her hands slid up the edges of his open BDU jacket. "Though they weren't doing exactly that."

"No?" He pushed on with a smirk, feeling his heart beating at an inhuman pace but not able to back out. Not willing. Vala must have liked it because she shook her head with a beautiful grin and pulled him in for a longer, more passionate kiss. He let himself enjoy it as long as he dared before pulling back to look into her questioning eyes.

"Well if they aren't going to miss us..." He shrugged, eliciting another happy smile from her face. Immediately she turned to open the door, took him by the hand, and pulled him out of the grey building. As they passed, looking like two naughty children out past curfew - in the middle of the afternoon - grins and minute smiles graced faces that hadn't seen anything but a frown in weeks. And which each level they flew above, the sun slowly returned to the mountain base, warming one, then two, then five as it rose. And Christmas, this year, was definitely going to be the event of a lifetime.


End file.
